Part 0: https://undertale.wiki/d/t/underflub-undertale-bloopers-chapter-0-intro/340
(If this goes on I’m making a Table of Contents as a profile subpage, if that’s feasible… and linking to that in future parts)
Frisk:…Okay, so… how did I get here?
* You fell. The flowers must have broken your fall.
Frisk: Wait, I didn’t think someone would actually answer me! Who are you? Why can’t I see you? What’s going on?
* Me? That’s… not important. Just think of me as your… helpful partner! And I’m… er… a phantom? I’m an invisible spirit. …Most people can’t even hear me, but I’m attached to you. I wouldn’t talk to me in front of others, by the way.
Frisk:Oh no, am I going crazy?!
* No, fallen human, you’re not. The Underground is just… weird. Now, since you’re clearly down in this cave, you should just proceed forwards. You know, through that archway. Staying in this one room won’t help you survive, you know. You need to try and get back to the surface.
Frisk:Well, Mr. Voice… I guess you’re right about leaving. Onwards!
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Flowey:Howdy! I’m Flower! Flower the- wait, wait a minute, no, that’s wrong! Um, can I get a do-over?
Frisk:Hey Flower!
Flowey:Oh my GOD, that is not my name! I messed up on that! It’s Glowey the- wait, no, that’s that other one’s name… Echoey! Echoey the- Wait, no, that’s its brother… Oh yes, Flowey the flowey! Wait, no- I mean
Frisk:Am I seriously talking to a talking flower that doesn’t even know its name?
Flowey:Welcome to Wonderland, human. Anyway… it’s Flowey the flour- Wait, uh, that’s not how you spell it, stupid textbox-
Frisk:What do you mean, ‘textbox’-
Flowey:Actually, you know what? I give up! We’re going to be moving onto the tutorial!
Frisk:Huh? Tutorial?
Flowey:So, since you’re new to the RUINS- I mean, Underground! New to the Underground!
* You feel like this is going to be a long day…
Flowey:Hey, be quiet, narrator!
Frisk:Wait, you can hear them too?
* …
Flowey:What? What do you mean? I… was… talking about you! Stop cutting me off all the time and let me do my monologue, idiot!
Flowey:…Anyways… tutorial time!
(Fight initiated)
Flowey: So, see that red SOUL? That is your- ..Um, the heart is the SOUL. Okay, there, done, it’s weak, gets stronger with some EXP.
Frisk: Experience points? Like in a game?
Flowey: No! Why did I say EXP? It’s LOVE! Right now you’re level 1!
Frisk: So, level or love? Which is it?
Flowey: LOVE! It’s LOVE! And it can go up if you run into my bullets! I mean.. pellets! Friendly, white harm- helpful, uh, pellets!
* You wonder just how many marbles the flower still has.
Flowey:Hey, that’s just RUDE!
(Toriel sends a fireball at Flowey and appears)
Toriel: What a terrible creature, torturing such a- Huh? ..Wait, he never attacked you..? I thought he would have done that by now.
Flowey: I WAS! I just got my speeches all messed up! Slowed me down!
Toriel: …Human, just follow me. We have to get through the puzzles together.
Frisk: Okay, what is even going on here?
* You realize trying to work it out will lead you nowhere, and follow Toriel.
Frisk: ..I do?
* Yes, you do. And you have a feeling she is guiding you to safety.
(Backstage)
* Flowey, just what was with you there?
Flowey:Look, I don’t know! It’s like my brain just froze! I couldn’t pull the right-
* …It’s probably some kind of nerves or something. Look. Just, you can try to imagine it’s still rehearsals? Or… something? (Oh, I’m not that good at coaching, am I?) Papyrus, you want to help him?
Papyrus:FLOWERY! ALL YOU HAVE TO TO IS PICTURE THAT THE ENTIRE AUDIENCE IS… ADORING FANS!
Flowey: … (freezes even more)
* And… you just made it worse, Papyrus. Also why did you use your in-character mangled nickname of him, you’re just making it even harder for him to remember his ACTUAL name! Uh, anyone? ANYONE know how to get Flowey back into- okay, know what, you, Undyne. You help him while I go back to Frisk. (I really hope this doesn’t backfire and we get an actual good Flowey outro in the Ruins…)