Rant post about the nintlarpdoers

why do these ppl think Mario is the only video game that exists? you got Kirby, pokemon, donkey kong, Metroid, etcetera, JUST GO TO ITCH.IO ALREADY! IT'S GOT LIKE THREE MILLION GAMES FOR FREE, GODDAMMIT!
And that beings me to something welse. Nintendo, did not "forget about," "kill," or "offically stop making" Mario! (all of which are actual YouTube video titles I saw) Which team do you think made DKB? That's like thinking there's gonna be a secret ninth episode of a show you just watched cuz the guys who made it have been double shifting all year cuz you're just that ungrateful! There was a 15 year wait between SML2:6GC and NSMB! play something else! did nintendo not reboot punch out for the Wii after twentyish years?
nintendo also does not have to make the next Mario game bigger than botw for y'all to be satisfied! (also a real statement I saw, honorable mention to the mildly incomprehensible "The next 3d Mario better have towns and cities with more than 10 blocks and 100 buildings") do you want to kill the odd worker!?
You do not "deserve" a new 3D Mario, nor a new smash bros, the former's team having been busy with dkb and the latter's creator having been busy with karrs
I'm out of ranting topics so imma make thank-you-survey-esque responses to the comment section of nin10doland's Yeah, They Killed Mario (no offense to anybody who appears on this)
"Mario died in the Ridley smash reveal.
Weren’t you paying any attention??" Good, worthy of top comment.
"GTA 6 before 3D Mario is crazy" sigh, we have to stop defaulting to this response I'm honestly sick of it
"No, the game is called “Mario is missing”" huh?
"I was in kindergarten when Mario Odyssey came out, now I'm in high school." there are a lot of comments like this which I'll be skipping
"forget gta 6, now were using 3d mario" we're
" It’s so sad when you notice that in his new intro, it’s all showing brand new Nintendo games, and then it ends with the nearly 9 year old Mario Odyssey because there’s no new 3D Mario to replace that shot. :pensive_face:" I thought its because its iconic?
"Absolutely unskippable title

Old title: "Mario was shot and found dead in an alley"" I agree
"Mario has Nintendo about forgotten" Huh?
"I really think that they expected us to just consume the Mario Galaxy Remasters and not ask questions afterwards." I disagree, it was just to hold the bottom feeders over
"What's bothering me isn't that they're taking so long to make the game, it's that they're taking so long to ANOUNCE that the game is BEING MADE" That "project" the last couple videos on Sakurai's yt was about (which are about six years old) was referring to kirby air riders, which did come out did it?
"I'm preparing myself for my personal worst case scenario: Bananza was the new 3d mario and the rumored game for next year is a N64 remake." one, don't trust rumors and two, that's too unreasonable, ik they remade oot but that would be desecrating Mario's legacy basically
" 4:33 Kirby is made by HAL. Both franchises have different studios and schedules." Irrelevant
"I knew it was Kirby from the beginning. Kirby has a different art style from Mario" What does that have to do with anything? Also go look at rtdl vs enesembwii
"Or there’s the very real possibility that the game has only been in development for six years, and the team was split into full DK Bananza and the new 3-D Mario after Bowser fury" that would be effectively three years if only half the team was working on it
"And if we really do only get a new 3D mario once a decade, I've got 5-6 left at best." don't 2d Mario's exist?
"Bro, at this point, it had better be so massive that it's three separate games, each with their own ginormous open world; have graphics like no one has ever seen before; have the absolute best video game story ever; have voiced character lines; and be 512 gigabytes total." This is ungrateful incarnate. And what are those semicolons doing there? Just use commas. Also, Odyssey was (does a search on super Mario wiki) 5.7 or so gigs and y'all seemed grateful! Are we deceasedrear!? YOU DON'T NEED ANY OF THOSE THINGS TO HAVE A GOOD GAME!!! THE NEXT 3D MARIO DOESN'T NEED TO BE ANY OF THOSE THINGS TO BE AS GOOD AS YOU'RE HYPING IT UP TO BE! You're lucky I'm keeping your ass anonymous.
"At this point I wouldn’t be surprised if a fan or a bunch of fans send letters to Nintendo asking where the heck is the next 3-D Mario game" There are so many things about this comment that I do not currently have the mental capacity to break down.
"The next 3D Mario game must be bigger than Zelda breath of the wild" ...

Just noticed that commenter is named Xander, but it's probably a coincidence.
"6:17 ....wait.... No..... Time hasn't..... Gone by that fast?!:exploding_head::tired_face:" Quit being dramatic.
"Am I the only one that could almost immediately tell it was a Kirby game? That wasn't just me right?" Another one regurgitates the dust. Joy
" That new Kirby looks dope af! :heart::heart::heart:" Thanks for not participating in this situation. Everybody thank @PedroTawa
"If Nate does say a 3D mario is planned, it's probably gonna be announced 2-8 months before release so it might be early 2027." I do not know nor care who Nate is. Based on what I know, he's a leaker and I frown at him.
"watch it just be "Focus M" the game and that's why it took so long" No.
"Kirby is the new Nintendo mascot I guess" Would not be disappointed but unlikely.
"It has been EIGHTEEN (18) YEARS since Wario Land Shake It." Don't sleep on the 'Ware.
"We WILL get our 3D Mario one day…

right?" Yes.
"Honestly Nintendo will make when they make I will wait and hope and be patient when they don’t announce it and when they do I will be really happy" This is the person everyone should aspire to be like.
"Don’t worry guys, with StarFox64 and Zelda64 out of the way, we’ll finally get a remake of Super Mario 64 in no time." It almost seems like you want a hyperrealistic SM64 remake.
"I don’t want a 3d Mario to be released right now because it’s gonna be rushed they need to put extra work into the next 3d Mario if they want it to be the best yet" Yup.
"Dawg, this game better be 10 times bigger than BOTW map, be completely covered with stuff to do, and have every single power up that has ever come out of Mario." :neutral_face:
"Homie.... the 3D Mario team made Bananza and it was absolutely their main focus after Odyssey. That's why it's been a longer wait for Mario.

They probably been working on the next Mario game but at a much slower rate due to Bananza." Tell that to every other commenter.
"people laughed, but nintendo might have actually forgotten about mario" (insert jevil plush with the word people lazily written on its forehead)
"Imagine the next 3D Mario is finally announced, and the reveal trailer starts with "SUPER MARIO HAS GONE MISSING"" Huh?
"Correction: He is not dead." Correct.
"After 10 years we present to you, Mario Odyssey 2, a 3-d linear experience" misread this as Mario 2-3D Land
"I think Nintendo has pretty much signalled that this is Zelda's year. I think we'll see something about new 3D Mario in early-mid 2027, with release at the end of that year, or Q1 2028." Yes. What is Q1.
"It’s almost like the 3d Mario team spent years making the first 3D DK game in 25 years and aren’t ready to announce a new Mario" :head_shaking_vertically:
"I will say, Nintendo bringing all their other IPs up to the quality of Mario and Zelda is a much better strategy than relying on Mario and Zelda to sell consoles." Yes. Also peak pfp of my tertiary smash main —>
" I really hate this manufactured news. Literally a handful of comments does not make it the entire Internet. Actually most people were like you and not even thinking about a new Mario :person_shrugging:" True.
"3D Mario needs a story at this point." 'At this point?'
" 0:52 guys should I replay Mario odyssey??? Or 100 both galaxy games??" Neither.
"How could Nintendo honestly have the balls to go without a new 3D Mario game for nearly a decade. ALMOST A DECADE!" How could YOU have the balls to assume Mario is the only game Nintendo has been working on for all this time. THE ENTIRETY OF THIS TIME!
"Are we just gonna forget that bowsers fury is a 3D Mario game which came out 5 years ago?

I’d also like to preface the fact that every game is made by a different team, and said teams are also human, so give them a break. The team that worked on Super Mario Odyssey also worked on Donkey Kong Bonanza, so that’s something to take into account." Yup.
" People really need to get off this "Why more Kirby before Mario?" narrative. Nintendo doesn't develop these Kirby games, HAL Labs develops them. And unlike Nintendo who has tons of other marketable franchises besides Mario, HAL Labs has Kirby and...what? Boxboy? :rofl: So of course we're going to get new Kirby games faster than new Mario games. No Kirby = no more HAL Labs. So yeah, the wait for a new Mario platformer is pretty lengthy at this point, but it's an apples to oranges comparison when you say "B-b-but Kirby!!!!" So give it up." Honestly a good point I didn't think about.
"And let’s not forget that because of the fall out with Ubisoft, we’ll never see another Mario + Rabbids game, which to me is one of the best Mario spinoffs." ...oh. okay. also irrelevant.
"Rockastar been giving more infos about GTA 6 for the past years, meanwhile Nintendo haven't even spoken a single letter about the next 3D Mario for 9 YEARS" Who is Rockastar?
" 1:40 I think this just goes to show how generic the Nintendo art style is" Nope, just reestablishes the precursor to this controversy that I think i'm gonna start calling Larpiogate.
" We better get three 3D Mario games after waiting all this time:

Sunshine 2
Galaxy 3
and
SUPER MARIO TITANS!:joy:" They got me in the first half, not gonna lie.
"Honestly. i'm glad samus is getting a new game after the disaster with metroid prime 4, not to mention that kirby getting a open world is just amazing! It's like sonic with frontiers" bro doesn't know
" Bro they tricked us 1:15 a new 3D Mario game is a myth atp." I think you're the guy from the clip
"Guys ,the people who did the last 3 D mario did Donkey Kong Bananza ,you cant make a game in 1-2 years" Yeah you can but if you don't plan right it'll be dookie

Okay. That is enough comments. How many was that, forty? Please don't variefy that. (context: I like to call verity variety because it always autocorrects to that anyway)

could you tell my anger dissipating as you go through the post cuz I sure do

also my other two smash mains are rob, young link occasionally, and pyra mythra (I genuinely like their moveset shut up)
I made a parody of that bit in looping the rooms to explain it
"Robot Robot Robot Robot Phantom Thief of Hearts, sword that seals the dark, I just like the kit, put away your darts"

:goddammit:

Aqua Wave * I had no idea people were complaining about ts for the record

TO: if you do, please watch out for sexual shit

TO: also i agree, and i main krool and diddy kong

Aqua Wave * I think there's tags for that tho

Just make sure to like, block the Adult tag or whatever and you're good

TO: there isn’t :<

Aqua Wave * There is. I looked just to make sure I avoided it

TO: where???

Aqua Wave * I meant an Adult tag

TO: oh ty so much :D

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
(slop online games generic platform that steals creator content mentioned)

Holy essay

but also cool things
such as

that was the commenter dam it

these crappy generic websites stole the entirety of Hollow Knight
THAT'S AN INDIE GAME!!
AN INDIE GAME THEY PUT

EFFORT

INTO!

I know
But still
"Zelda64"

just because it is a rough does not mean there are no diamonds in it
did you not look at my two examples

guessing this is some reference I don't understand